Touch ups: Stretch it out but don't hurt your hair

Stretching is like the holy grail of healthy hair practices for those who relax. If you are able to do it successfully, you'll be rewarded with thicker, more resilient hair. It's no wonder you see hair boards loaded stretching superstars able to extend the time between touch-ups up for up to a year. Remember the days when relaxing every 6-8 weeks seemed like a long time? Well those days are long gone so stretching correctly is now a must.

Like a two sided coin, stretching can produce two very different results. A couple of wrong moves and your hope of retaining length from the process is destroyed. I received an email from a Relaxed Hair Health reader asking me "when is a good time to say when" while stretching. I figured I would further elaborate my answer here for everyone's benefit.

So let me start by saying that when you're deep into your stretch, it's a whole 'nother ball game. By the way, for the purposes of this discussion, I will not be talking about specific weeks post relaxer because terms like "deep in your stretch" are different for everyone. When I say deep in your stretch, I'm referring to a period of time when you have adequate new growth.

So as you begin to deal with two distinct textures, you've got to be able to adapt fairly quickly. What is your hair asking for now? Are those watery leave-in conditioners still cuttin' it? Is rollersetting still the best method of styling? I don't have those answers for you but these are the types of questions you should be asking yourself during that critical time. This is do or die for your hair and you must be able to react quickly.

A couple of things you should consider while stretching. First, don't be a superhero and try to stretch 30 weeks if your longest was 9. I only recommend super-extended stretches if the hair is protected and little manipulation will occur. A stretch should be just as the word implies, waiting just a little longer than last time and building your resistance gradually. So your last stretch was nine weeks, why not set a goal for 10 or 11? It's all about progressive improvement and keeping the hair healthy at the same time.

So let's talk about breakage. Part of the reason I have such a supped-up moisture regimen comes from trying to maintain elasticity while dealing with the two textures. Your hair has to be able to withstand breakage so keeping the hair moist is key. I'm pretty proud of my last stretch where I was able to reach new heights both in duration and in how manageable the hair was throughout. It was from my days of stretching that I began adding conditioner boosters and seeking out the benefits of steam. These are the times where your hair requires more and if you're willing to respond, you may find yourself with some ultra-healthy habits that can benefit your hair long after your stretch is over. Your goal should be to fine tune your regimen ever so slightly to incramentally improve upon your results.

With every stretch, you should acknowledge your hindrances and address them the following stretch. For instance, my last experience was bitter sweet as I had to spend nearly a full day babying a bazillion tangles out of my hair. So my lesson was that I couldn't just leave my new growth alone and see what happens, I had to be proactive and take the time to fully detangle on a regular basis. Lesson learned and I'm making sure I don't run into that problem ever again.

Your stretch is also a good time to figure out if you're using the right products at the right time. In general, you want to start heading for the thicker, more nourishing products that act as extra reinforcement to the hair. Thicker oils, creams, and moisturizers are wonderful especially during times when you manipulate the hair. You can opt to dilute those products if you wish but they are certainly worth including in your regimen.

One last piece of advice I would give you is to not be afraid of "giving in" and touching up if necessary. Again, this is not about being a hero, it's about doing what's best for your hair. The minute you find yourself completely overwhelmed with breakage, tangles, etc, and you're losing more ground than you're gaining, it's time to relax. But don't just relax for the sake of relaxing, I also want you to identify what the barrier was to you reaching your goal, then address it next stretch. The end game of it all is all about retaining length. So make sure you do what's best for your hair during that time.

Lessons Learned from my last Relaxer Stretch

I'm so excited. I officially accomplished a personal goal of stretching a full 16 weeks. For me, that was the longest relaxer stretch ever! Four months ago, I visited a Dominican salon for a touch up. I walked in there with three months worth of summer new growth growth, I walked out with freshly relaxed bone straight hair and about 3 inches of hair cut off. No, I didn't ask my stylist to cut my hair but, for some reason, she had a strong desire to do a major trim. Looking back, I know exactly why she did it.

I'll get back to that later but the real reason for this post is because I want to discuss all the good and not so good, I experienced over the past four months. I'd like to be as detailed as possible for my own edification. I'm going to use this post as I would an entry in my hair journal, as a way of sealing in the learning from the last four months so I can replicate the successes and course correct in the areas where I struggled.

So let me start by discussing the state of my hair as it is today. The goals I set out four months ago were to eliminate/reduce breakage, increase moisture levels, strengthen strands overall, and last but not least, thicken the look of the my hair overall. Four months later, my hair feels much stronger, is more elastic, and has retained length and thickened. I'm not exactly where I want to be but I'm more than half way there. Now let's get into what I did the past four months.

Nutrition
I tried my best to remain as consistent as possible with vitamin support for my hair. If you remember, the last stretch was when I was introduced to Noridic Naturals purified omega 3 fish oils. I must say that I'm pretty proud of myself on how consistent I've been with these fish oils. I've already gone through my first bottle and and now working through my second (larger size) Nordic Naturals Omega 3. We're partners for life now. Other supplements that I've tried to remain consistent with are my chlorella green tablets. I also take biotin, a vitamin B supplement, and a multi from time to time. One other supplement I started taking fairly consistently was Cell Food. I'm not sure what the benefits to the hair are, if any. I really just take it for overall nutritional support. My main goal when taking the supplements was not growth, I take supplements more for support. My theory is that the hair has to be a strong as possible coming out of the scalp so it can be more resilient when it undergoes the relaxer process. Not sure how much truth there is to my theory but it makes sense on the most basic level so I'm stickin' with it. Oh, and I should also mentioned that I reintroduced carrot juice back into the line up late into my stretch. I went to the grocery store one day and found Bolthouse farm juice in new larger sizes. The minute I saw it, I knew I had to get a piece of that action. One area that we struggle most with when taking our vitamins is consistency. What I tried to do was not get down on myself if I missed a day here and there. I just started right where I left off and kept it moving.

Routines
As you may already know, I don't hide my hair like I "should". I know of the incredible benefits of protective styling so I gave in a little this last stretch. I didn't bun more than normal last stretch, what I did do was tie my hair up with my scarf more often. So instead of laying on my couch watching a movie, I'd lay on the couch with my hair tied up while watching a movie. I should also take a moment to say that I love my silk scarf much more than my satin (polyester) ones. This year, I'll be beefing up silk scarf collection. I think my husband is tired of seeing me in the same leopard print design day after day. I have no problem tying my hair up because I think of it as a way of recharging my hair. As my hair is exposed all day, it's kinda like having your cell phone off the charger. Sure you can use it all day but sooner or later, you'll have to charge it to get maximum benefit. You best believe that I'll be continuing this habit over the next 3-4 months.

Another technique I implemented over the past three months was using a plastic cap in the morning's as a way of enhancing moisture. What I tried to do was use the plastic cap to simulate humidity and create a slightly damp feel on the hair. Once the hair felt slightly damp (after about 5-10 minutes), I'd remove the plastic cap, add some Gleau oil and tie the hair down with a silk scarf to seal. This technique really helped with me with dryness issues, especially during the winter months when the air is drier than normal. I hope this technique continues to impact my hair positively going forward. Another routine I implemented was trimming according to the lunar cycle. I don't know if that attributed to more growth but I will say that I trimmed more last stretch than I've done in a while. At one point during my stretch, I trimmed just for the heck of it only to find out that the lunar calendar trim was only a few weeks away. I trimmed anyway and I still retained length overall.

I think the area where I made my biggest progress overall was in my weekly wash routine. Over the past four months, I've been nursing one side of my hair which seemed to struggle more than the other side. With the introduction of my facial steamer to my routine. I was able to dedicate a little more effort to the pre-poo step. This extra attention was absolutely critical to the progress I made this last stretch. Week after week, I spent a large amount of time paying attention to the areas of my hair that needed the most attention. Four months later....progress. I'm not right where I want to be yet, but I am much closer to seeing the light than ever before. I treat my wash routine unlike anything else in my life. There are certain other practices that I'd like to remain consistent on but I have to admit, it sometimes still is a struggle for me. Not with my wash routine. There is never (ever) even the hint of deviation from my routine. My mind never debates whether I should carry out the extended pre-poo step or whether I should skip it this one time. Never! Now if only I can transfer that level of dedication to some of the other areas of my life.

Products
Over the past four months, I used pretty much the same staples. The only new products I used were the Asience conditioner, and I also purchased Burt's Bees Hair Repair Shea and Grapefruit deep conditioner. I didn't do an official review post on this product because I don't really use it for it's intended purposes. It's supposed to be a 2 minute treatment but I've been using it consistently in my pre-poos. The ingredients are more in line with a moisturizing conditioner than a 2 minute treatment. Since it contained practically no proteins, I put it to use for other purposes. So far so good. Overall, my routine has been a moisture routine with a little protein mixed in. Since my hair doesn't appreciate protein like it should, I sneak the protein into it's food as one would a stubborn child who won't take it's medicine. This method works really well for me so far, but as always, if there's a better way, I'll find it and I'll chuck this routine without even batting an eye.

Struggles
I'd like to talk a little about where I struggled and what I'll do going forward to avoid or minimize the issues I experienced. This stretch just happened to land right in the middle of shedding season. Every year, around fall, my hair begins it's shedding ritual. The crazy amount of shedding pretty much created the worse bout of tangles I've ever experienced in my life. Even after I relaxed, I had beaucoup tangles to contend with. I take 100% accountability for what I had to go through when I spent pretty much all day babying tangles out of my hair. That's the reason why the lady at the Dominican salon cut my hair last relaxer, they neither had the time nor the patience to deal with my hair's issues. When I stretch, I have the tendency to detangle the length of the hair, while overlooking the roots. What I do is allow the roots to remain in it's compacted position without doing my due diligence in detangling. Meanwhile, my shed coils are getting even more deeply intertwined with it's neighbors. I can't let this happen ever again, so I'll have to do a major detangle at least once a week during my pre-poo so I can release all the hair that's been shed throughout the week. If I find that once a week ain't cuttin' it, I'll increase the frequency. Not only will I play defense by detangling on a regular basis, I'll also have to play some offense and implement strategies that slow the amount shedding.

So here I stand ready to begin another long stretch. I've got a lot to look forward to. I hope to learn even more about my hair this go around. And with the focus on uber-healthy ingredients like ceramides and such, only good things will come about I'm sure. If I had to attribute anything to the success of the past stretch, I would say it was consistency. One thing I could certainly say about my last stretch is that I maintained a laser like focus pretty much the entire time. I knew the day would come when I would enjoy the wonderful fruits of my labor in the form of healthier hair. Today, I look back and smile proudly at what I was able to accomplish. Again, I'm not talking so much about the results as I am the focus and dedication level. As long as these remain, the results will follow. Thanks you all for being in it with me for the long haul. Now enough talking about the past, I'm ready to focus on what's next for my hair.

Thanks for listening.